He had always loved those who were his own in the world, and he loved them all the way to the end.
John 13:1b NCV

Confusion, shock, betrayal, loneliness, bewilderment, shame, heartbreak…

Jesus’ disciples were experiencing a crisis. They had spent the last three years following Someone who had turned their own way of life on its ear. Love your enemies…forgive if you want to be forgiven…worship God from the heart…people healed on the spot…ceremony and following endless rules out the window…I (Jesus) am the way, the truth, and the life…I am the bread…I am the water…Come to me for rest…Lazarus raised from the dead…the least is the greatest…

And now, the One Peter had declared to be the Messiah and Son of God was dead. Some had seen it with their own eyes. Others had been in hiding, afraid for their own lives and utterly confused. How could He be the Son of God and yet die so horribly? Couldn’t the One Who had raised the dead have avoided that in any of a number of ways? And the shame! Running away, deserting Him when He had taken care of their every need for the last three years, but not being allowed to fight! What were they supposed to do?? And what about Judas? They had eaten, slept, traveled together. He had seen the same miracles they did. He was a little strange, but this! He hadn’t only betrayed Jesus. He had betrayed them all.

And so they huddled together, afraid of a knock on the door that would take them away to the same fate Jesus had met. Remembering the zealot and his followers who had been lined up on crosses… Suddenly feeling foolish, and yet..He wasn’t like any other. Much more than a leader, He was a Friend like no other. Always putting them first, considerate of their needs, loving them. And they loved Him. He had said some hard-to-understand things about seeing Him, and then not seeing Him, and then seeing Him again. Could it be they hadn’t seen Him for the last time after all? Afraid to hope, and yet…

Categories: About Jesus

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